Dear Joe,
I write to ask you to consider again why you choose me of all ladies in a world of 8 billion people? Perhaps it is because our parents decided this before we were born, perhaps you have unrealistic expectations of me or are merely in love with the idea of being in love with me. Before you however make this decision to do forever with me, let me tell you some things about me.
You will not be my first; I have had another. Not just one actually but several. The more lovers I took, the more undeserving I felt, and the more I broke my values. After all, I’m a broken vessel. I do not tell you this to get your sympathy or pity. I write to let you know, I’m not some preserved porcelain on a shelf for you to unravel. I have moved and accepted who I am. If you can’t take this, I will absolutely understand. Besides, who wants to be with a betrothed who couldn’t act betrothed?
I don’t know how to share space with someone for too long. I get enthusiastic at first but I quickly lose that enthusiasm and begin to feel choked. Sometimes, I just want my bed to myself, some other times, I’m a cat in heat and I can be the cuddliest person that ever lived. Know this, I am not always excited to have someone in my space. I’m not sure how I will handle marriage especially when I have to share everything with you FOREVER! Do you have any suggestions? I don’t mind a conversation on this. But that’s if you’re willing.
I don’t cook. I know wives cook in your place but I have a great problem with food; I never eat when I cook and I never cook when I don’t have someone to cook for. All my life, I’ve cooked for others and now, I hardly light a fire because I’m learning to eat. Please tell me you know how to cook. I want a man who can cook too so at least, I can eat one great food a week. Can you cook?
I know this is an unusual curve, but I’ll rather we both know what we are in for. Please write me back. Perhaps, you will tell me something I don’t know about you too.
Yours in reasoning
Fanny.
By Liza Chuma Akunyili on .
Exported from Medium on February 2, 2026.