The answer to can I date my friend is always yes. The question is always why you want to date your friend and if you are willing to go all the way.
It is scary to fall in love with your friend because you risk losing the subject of your fantasy and a relationship you value in everyday life. However, that is a risk worth taking any day.
When you say someone is your friend, you are saying your relationship with them is mutual and not one-sided. You know them and they know you. You enjoy their presence and they do the same.
It makes perfect sense that you want to have a world they are always a part of. However, do you love this person or do you love how they make you feel? How they make you feel is great. You definitely want someone who makes you feel important, valued, heard etc. But, if that is the only reason you want them, you might be more selfish than you realise with this person. If you love them, you will prioritise loving them, valuing them and hearing them out. In romantic relationships, you can’t sweep things under the carpet and change the partner like you can easily do with friendships. Therefore, answering this question is important for both your sakes: do you like your friend or do you like how they make you feel?
Perhaps you have more than one great friend whom you like, use the list below as a guide to choose:
1️⃣ The one you respect
2️⃣ The one whose life you want to make easier
3️⃣ The one you are mostly yourself around
4️⃣ The one you are not afraid to confront
5️⃣ The one you want to talk to when you fail because they’ll keep you grounded
6️⃣ The one you are comfortable telling that you succeeded because they’ll be happy for you
7️⃣ The one you have chemistry with (this includes liking the idea that if you had to sleep with this person for the rest of your life, you will not feel bad).
If you have one friend who meets this and you like who you are around them and genuinely like them, you should be praying. You really should be asking God what to do with this friendship. You may wonder why this is important:
1️⃣ A person can seem great today and not fit your future and only God knows that.
2️⃣ Even if this person is not your spouse, you need to ask God how to help you set a hard boundary so this friendship does not become a place you can emotionally or sexually cheat on your spouse in the future.
3️⃣ This person could very well be your spouse and you are letting your heart get smashed on these dating streets. Get into prayer and receive directions and strategy for how to be visible, received and prioritised.
Whatever the answer you get in prayer, congratulations! Congratulations because you now have direction; date or change direction.